Well it has been more than 2 years since I last wrote......I thought about writing so many times but somehow couldn't get myself to.....
Guess what got me writing finally ???......none other then a realization at work....a realization that I love speaking and facilitating and interacting and telling.....which is apparent from the fact that I love talking about incidents that happen in my life.....and my constant need for attention leads me to this blog once in a while .
The realization I had today after taking an induction session for new joinees was I love taking training sessions......what I love even more is the positive feedback I receive at the end of it! I love being the focal point of an event......love being under the spotlight, love dancing on stage, love acting, love being the elder child! And as linda goodman says about Leo women, I love being a sunflower not a wallflower!
This realization got me to think about my career.....and my job.....the fact that I am an hr manager.....a person who has to constantly take criticism ......act as a punching bag! Well I was not born to be a punching bag.....I was born to punch ......and isn't it high time I started punching!
And so I decided to punch in a few words...and found myself opening facebook ....where i ended up writing the longest status update ever! And when the status update became tooo long.....for all that was not written.....I finally opened my blog!
And suddenly there were so many realizations, thoughts, words flowing out of me........
In the last 2 years I have slowly and steadily allowed my self to become a punching bag! This realization is so strong and so clear to me to me now! I have allowed things to happen to me....I have not made things happen!
I have let myself be bullied, criticised......I have withdrawn my self from the world , people, life I knew!
A lot many people say I have become a calmer, happier person! But the ones who have witnessed my most workoholic, ambitious, aggressive, angry, crazy, vulnerable, lovelorn, or even drunk avatar.....know that the person they knew is gone! It's because I have been punched tooo hard ......I long for the day it would stop!
This does not mean I am not loved, adored or cared for! I have the most loving husband, the most adorable dog, a life a lot would envy!!
What I loathe is being this round, slouching, torn punching bag......I wish to be my old self, I so wish that the person I love most....could have seen me in a state in which I was loved most, a state of me I loved most!
Guess what got me writing finally ???......none other then a realization at work....a realization that I love speaking and facilitating and interacting and telling.....which is apparent from the fact that I love talking about incidents that happen in my life.....and my constant need for attention leads me to this blog once in a while .
The realization I had today after taking an induction session for new joinees was I love taking training sessions......what I love even more is the positive feedback I receive at the end of it! I love being the focal point of an event......love being under the spotlight, love dancing on stage, love acting, love being the elder child! And as linda goodman says about Leo women, I love being a sunflower not a wallflower!
This realization got me to think about my career.....and my job.....the fact that I am an hr manager.....a person who has to constantly take criticism ......act as a punching bag! Well I was not born to be a punching bag.....I was born to punch ......and isn't it high time I started punching!
And so I decided to punch in a few words...and found myself opening facebook ....where i ended up writing the longest status update ever! And when the status update became tooo long.....for all that was not written.....I finally opened my blog!
And suddenly there were so many realizations, thoughts, words flowing out of me........
In the last 2 years I have slowly and steadily allowed my self to become a punching bag! This realization is so strong and so clear to me to me now! I have allowed things to happen to me....I have not made things happen!
I have let myself be bullied, criticised......I have withdrawn my self from the world , people, life I knew!
A lot many people say I have become a calmer, happier person! But the ones who have witnessed my most workoholic, ambitious, aggressive, angry, crazy, vulnerable, lovelorn, or even drunk avatar.....know that the person they knew is gone! It's because I have been punched tooo hard ......I long for the day it would stop!
This does not mean I am not loved, adored or cared for! I have the most loving husband, the most adorable dog, a life a lot would envy!!
What I loathe is being this round, slouching, torn punching bag......I wish to be my old self, I so wish that the person I love most....could have seen me in a state in which I was loved most, a state of me I loved most!
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